As November edged into its second week, I transcended from Movember novice into a fully-fledged slightly-better-than-novice.
Those who read my last entry will have noticed I had the beginnings of a slither of a – dare I say – almost trendy moustache on the way. In order to cultivate this I wore my sheepskin jacket and check shirts approximately 90% of time time – even to bed.
Over the next few days the moustache – with the help of my clothing choices and what can only be described as a 4 o’clock shadow – developed into something so hipster that it’s bought its own flat in East London and now owns an independent coffee shop.
Unfortunately, this wasn’t to last.
As the stubble around my face threatened to suggest to people that my facial hair was intentional rather than a side-effect of peer pressure I knew I had to shave it off. Work photos were the next day as well and the idea those taking part have to look as ridiculous as possible would not be lost on anyone.
I briefly toyed with the horseshoe-esque style you can see above but had to shave the sides off after my housemate projectile-vomited at the sight of me and two police cars were called to the scene. It was not to be.
So as I enter the second half of my Movember challenge I’m left with this unwanted tenant on my upper lip – a hairy caterpillar clinging on and making me look like Ned Flanders’ creepier and more sinister brother.
I’ll never own a coffee shop.
If you would like to donate to my Movember page and leave requests for facial hair that I’ll probably ignore, click here!